Greyhawk
06-07-2005, 03:13 PM
*Legal mumbo-jumbo: This story is not licensed or endorsed by Bright, Kauffman and Crane Productions and/or Warner Brothers. All characters and Central Perk are registered trademarks of Warner Brothers, all rights reserved.
TOW The Graduation
[ At Monica and Chandler's apartment. Ross is quizzing Phoebe ]
Ross: Which country did William the Conqueror invade?
Phoebe: Ross, I appreciate this, but it's getting late
Ross: Do you want to do good on your final exam?
Phoebe: Yes
Ross: Do you want your diploma
Phoebe: Yes
Ross: Then answer the question
Phoebe (yawning): England
Ross: Correct. Next question: Who developed the Theory of Relativity?
Phoebe (nodding off): Umm
Ross: PHOEBE!
Phoebe: I did my homework Mr. Stuart!
Ross: Pheebs
Phoebe: Albert Einstein
Ross: Very good.
Phoebe: Ross.....
Ross: Ok. Just one more. How many pages does this book (Lifts the book "World History", which Phoebe has been studying) have
Phoebe: Who would ask that kind of question?
Ross: It's a trick question they may throw at you. You have to be prepared for any kind of question
Phoebe: OK. I got a question for you. It's 1 AM and I am bone-tired.....my question is whose ass am I gonna kick, if they ask me one more question?
-- Opening Credits --
[ The next day at Central Perk. Only Phoebe is present, reading and studying notes. Joey and Chandler enter a few minutes later. Joey sits on the sofa and Chandler goes to the counter ]
Joey (To Phoebe): What are you reading, now?
Phoebe: Geography
Joey: Need any help?
Chandler (returning from the counter with a Latte): This from the person who thought you need a passport to go to New Mexico
Joey: Look who's talking, Mr. "Texas is a State"
Chandler: Texas is a state, Joe.
Joey: Then how come, on The Travel Channel, they say always say "Texas....It's like a whole other country"?
Chandler: That's the advertising slogan, you freak!
Phoebe: Hush! Some people are trying to study!
Joey and Chandler: Sorry
Phoebe: I'm sorry. I'm just under a lot of pressure right now. My final exam is tomorrow
Joey: What about Alaska?
Chandler: It's a state too, Joe
Joey (laughing): Yeah, right
** Chandler buries his head in his hands **
Joey: I'm gonna get a coffee. Does anybody want anything?
Phoebe: I could use a scone
** Joey goes to the counter as Monica and Rachel enter **
Monica (sitting next to Chandler): How's it coming, Pheebs?
Phoebe: I'm confused now.
Rachel: About what?
Phoebe: I don't know if Texas is a State, anymore
Monica: What?
Phoebe: Chandler says it's a State, but Joey says it's not.
Monica: It used to be a State.
Chandler: What do you mean "used to"? It still IS a state!
Joey (handing Phoebe a scone): Told ya
Rachel: So if Texas is not a State.... then New Mexico must be a part of Mexico
Joey: Exactly
Chandler (leaving): The real irony is that it's you guys, who should be going to school
Phoebe (putting the book away): That was fun
Rachel: So how's it going, for real?
Phoebe: OK, I guess. I'm just nervous about the exam tomorrow
Monica: You want us to quiz you?
Phoebe: That'll be great
[ Later that evening, everybody is at Monica and Chandler's apartment. Monica is helping Phoebe study. Chandler and Joey are watching TV and Rachel and Ross are on the sofa talking ]
Phoebe: Wow. Just think, I'm gonna get a diploma!
Rachel: That reminds me.....
** Rachel goes to Monica's room and comes out with a box and hands it to Phoebe **
Phoebe (opening the box to reveal a cap and gown): Oh my God! My own graduation cap and gown!
Rachel: Every graduate needs one
Phoebe: Aren't we getting ahead of ourselves here? I still need to pass the test tomorrow.
Monica: Sweetie, relax. You know this stuff inside out. You'll do fine.
Rachel: You'll look so cute on stage getting your diploma!
Phoebe: Really? There's going to be a graduation ceremony?
Ross: Of course. And don't forget the Prom
Phoebe: There's gonna be a prom too?
Rachel: Of course there is.
Phoebe: Wow! I can't wait for tomorrow
Monica: Get some sleep and tomorrow will be here, before you know it
[ The next morning, Monica brings breakfast in bed for Phoebe ]
Phoebe: Wow. Thanks, Mon
Monica: No problem. Do you want to run over the quiz, one more time?
** Phoebe takes a bite of toast a nods **
** In the living room. The rest of the gang are eating. Chandler enters carrying a map **
Chandler (unfolding the map): OK, Joe. This is a map of America. It has all the states. (pointing to New Mexico): New Mexico... it's a State, Joe. (pointing to Alaska): Alaska, it's a State too.... (pointing to Texas) and Texas, also a State.
Joey (pointing at Arizona): Since when did Arizona become a State?
** Chandler lets out a defeated sigh and sits down **
Rachel: Thank God you're pretty, Joey
Joey: Thanks, Rach.
[ About an hour later. Only Phoebe, Monica, and Ross are still at the apartment ]
Ross: You ready, Phoebe?
Phoebe: As ready as I'll ever be.
Monica: Good Luck
-- Commercial --
[ Ross escorts Phoebe to the classroom ]
Ross: OK. You know this stuff. You can do it. You can do it.
Teacher: Yes she can....but she has to do it, alone
Ross (pointing to the hall): I'll be right outside
[ A few hours pass and Phoebe emerges from the class ]
Ross: So?
Phoebe: It was hard, but I think I did OK
Teacher: She did more than OK. She got a 100. She got the 2cd highest score
Ross: 2cd highest?
Teacher: There was an extra credit question she didn't answer
Phoebe: But I answered it
Teacher: There were 2
Phoebe: I didn't see the 2cd question
Teacher: OK.....I gave Danny a chance and I'll give you a chance (reading from a sheet of paper) In your textbook, titled "English: The Universal Language", on what date was the book published?
Ross: You know this!
Phoebe: I know it......it's on the tip of my tongue.... It's......It's.......I can't remember
Teacher: That's OK. You still got a 100
Ross: That's OK, Pheebs. a 100 is nothing to be ashamed of
** Phoebe and Ross walk down the hall **
Phoebe: If only I could have known the book was published Jun 2, 1994.....OH YEA! (running back to the teacher): The book was published on Jun 2, 1994
Teacher: Congratulations. You have earned the highest grade in the class
** Phoebe hugs the teacher and Ross **
Phoebe: Thank you, Ross
Ross: Don't thank me. You earned it.
Phoebe: So when's the Graduation?
Teacher: The what?
Phoebe: When's the Graduation?
Teacher: Phoebe, I'm sorry, but there is no Graduation in night school.
Phoebe: When will I get my diploma
Teacher: We'll mail them out next week
Phoebe: No graduation?
Teacher: I'm sorry, Phoebe
** Phoebe walks away **
Ross: Pheebs?
Phoebe: I just want to be alone, right now (Phoebe walks off )
Ross (to the teacher): Come on, buddy.
Teacher: I'm sorry, sir. It's out of my hands
Ross: That's great. These people bust their ass going to school at night because they have jobs during the day. And what do they get? "You'll get your diploma in the mail". Can you save the postage?
Teacher: I'm really sorry, sir. I wish there was something I could do. I really do.
[ Back at Monica and Chandler's apartment ]
Ross: Phoebe hasn't been by yet, has she?
Monica: Not yet... but I think I may have an idea
[ Later on, Phoebe walks to Monica and Chandler's apartment. Monica left a note saying "Come to Central Perk" ]
-- Ending Credits --
[ Central Perk looked dark from the outside, but it was un-locked so Phoebe went in. The lights came on and all of her friends, classmates, and co-workers jump up shouting "Surprise". Over the counter was a banner that read "Class of 2005 ]
Phoebe: What's going on?
Monica (handing Phoebe her cap and gown): It's your graduation, silly
[ One by one, the teacher had the students walk to the counter and he presented them with their diplomas ]
Chandler (whispering to Monica): Should we say anything?
Monica (rubbing her belly and smiling): Not now. This is her night
TOW The Graduation
[ At Monica and Chandler's apartment. Ross is quizzing Phoebe ]
Ross: Which country did William the Conqueror invade?
Phoebe: Ross, I appreciate this, but it's getting late
Ross: Do you want to do good on your final exam?
Phoebe: Yes
Ross: Do you want your diploma
Phoebe: Yes
Ross: Then answer the question
Phoebe (yawning): England
Ross: Correct. Next question: Who developed the Theory of Relativity?
Phoebe (nodding off): Umm
Ross: PHOEBE!
Phoebe: I did my homework Mr. Stuart!
Ross: Pheebs
Phoebe: Albert Einstein
Ross: Very good.
Phoebe: Ross.....
Ross: Ok. Just one more. How many pages does this book (Lifts the book "World History", which Phoebe has been studying) have
Phoebe: Who would ask that kind of question?
Ross: It's a trick question they may throw at you. You have to be prepared for any kind of question
Phoebe: OK. I got a question for you. It's 1 AM and I am bone-tired.....my question is whose ass am I gonna kick, if they ask me one more question?
-- Opening Credits --
[ The next day at Central Perk. Only Phoebe is present, reading and studying notes. Joey and Chandler enter a few minutes later. Joey sits on the sofa and Chandler goes to the counter ]
Joey (To Phoebe): What are you reading, now?
Phoebe: Geography
Joey: Need any help?
Chandler (returning from the counter with a Latte): This from the person who thought you need a passport to go to New Mexico
Joey: Look who's talking, Mr. "Texas is a State"
Chandler: Texas is a state, Joe.
Joey: Then how come, on The Travel Channel, they say always say "Texas....It's like a whole other country"?
Chandler: That's the advertising slogan, you freak!
Phoebe: Hush! Some people are trying to study!
Joey and Chandler: Sorry
Phoebe: I'm sorry. I'm just under a lot of pressure right now. My final exam is tomorrow
Joey: What about Alaska?
Chandler: It's a state too, Joe
Joey (laughing): Yeah, right
** Chandler buries his head in his hands **
Joey: I'm gonna get a coffee. Does anybody want anything?
Phoebe: I could use a scone
** Joey goes to the counter as Monica and Rachel enter **
Monica (sitting next to Chandler): How's it coming, Pheebs?
Phoebe: I'm confused now.
Rachel: About what?
Phoebe: I don't know if Texas is a State, anymore
Monica: What?
Phoebe: Chandler says it's a State, but Joey says it's not.
Monica: It used to be a State.
Chandler: What do you mean "used to"? It still IS a state!
Joey (handing Phoebe a scone): Told ya
Rachel: So if Texas is not a State.... then New Mexico must be a part of Mexico
Joey: Exactly
Chandler (leaving): The real irony is that it's you guys, who should be going to school
Phoebe (putting the book away): That was fun
Rachel: So how's it going, for real?
Phoebe: OK, I guess. I'm just nervous about the exam tomorrow
Monica: You want us to quiz you?
Phoebe: That'll be great
[ Later that evening, everybody is at Monica and Chandler's apartment. Monica is helping Phoebe study. Chandler and Joey are watching TV and Rachel and Ross are on the sofa talking ]
Phoebe: Wow. Just think, I'm gonna get a diploma!
Rachel: That reminds me.....
** Rachel goes to Monica's room and comes out with a box and hands it to Phoebe **
Phoebe (opening the box to reveal a cap and gown): Oh my God! My own graduation cap and gown!
Rachel: Every graduate needs one
Phoebe: Aren't we getting ahead of ourselves here? I still need to pass the test tomorrow.
Monica: Sweetie, relax. You know this stuff inside out. You'll do fine.
Rachel: You'll look so cute on stage getting your diploma!
Phoebe: Really? There's going to be a graduation ceremony?
Ross: Of course. And don't forget the Prom
Phoebe: There's gonna be a prom too?
Rachel: Of course there is.
Phoebe: Wow! I can't wait for tomorrow
Monica: Get some sleep and tomorrow will be here, before you know it
[ The next morning, Monica brings breakfast in bed for Phoebe ]
Phoebe: Wow. Thanks, Mon
Monica: No problem. Do you want to run over the quiz, one more time?
** Phoebe takes a bite of toast a nods **
** In the living room. The rest of the gang are eating. Chandler enters carrying a map **
Chandler (unfolding the map): OK, Joe. This is a map of America. It has all the states. (pointing to New Mexico): New Mexico... it's a State, Joe. (pointing to Alaska): Alaska, it's a State too.... (pointing to Texas) and Texas, also a State.
Joey (pointing at Arizona): Since when did Arizona become a State?
** Chandler lets out a defeated sigh and sits down **
Rachel: Thank God you're pretty, Joey
Joey: Thanks, Rach.
[ About an hour later. Only Phoebe, Monica, and Ross are still at the apartment ]
Ross: You ready, Phoebe?
Phoebe: As ready as I'll ever be.
Monica: Good Luck
-- Commercial --
[ Ross escorts Phoebe to the classroom ]
Ross: OK. You know this stuff. You can do it. You can do it.
Teacher: Yes she can....but she has to do it, alone
Ross (pointing to the hall): I'll be right outside
[ A few hours pass and Phoebe emerges from the class ]
Ross: So?
Phoebe: It was hard, but I think I did OK
Teacher: She did more than OK. She got a 100. She got the 2cd highest score
Ross: 2cd highest?
Teacher: There was an extra credit question she didn't answer
Phoebe: But I answered it
Teacher: There were 2
Phoebe: I didn't see the 2cd question
Teacher: OK.....I gave Danny a chance and I'll give you a chance (reading from a sheet of paper) In your textbook, titled "English: The Universal Language", on what date was the book published?
Ross: You know this!
Phoebe: I know it......it's on the tip of my tongue.... It's......It's.......I can't remember
Teacher: That's OK. You still got a 100
Ross: That's OK, Pheebs. a 100 is nothing to be ashamed of
** Phoebe and Ross walk down the hall **
Phoebe: If only I could have known the book was published Jun 2, 1994.....OH YEA! (running back to the teacher): The book was published on Jun 2, 1994
Teacher: Congratulations. You have earned the highest grade in the class
** Phoebe hugs the teacher and Ross **
Phoebe: Thank you, Ross
Ross: Don't thank me. You earned it.
Phoebe: So when's the Graduation?
Teacher: The what?
Phoebe: When's the Graduation?
Teacher: Phoebe, I'm sorry, but there is no Graduation in night school.
Phoebe: When will I get my diploma
Teacher: We'll mail them out next week
Phoebe: No graduation?
Teacher: I'm sorry, Phoebe
** Phoebe walks away **
Ross: Pheebs?
Phoebe: I just want to be alone, right now (Phoebe walks off )
Ross (to the teacher): Come on, buddy.
Teacher: I'm sorry, sir. It's out of my hands
Ross: That's great. These people bust their ass going to school at night because they have jobs during the day. And what do they get? "You'll get your diploma in the mail". Can you save the postage?
Teacher: I'm really sorry, sir. I wish there was something I could do. I really do.
[ Back at Monica and Chandler's apartment ]
Ross: Phoebe hasn't been by yet, has she?
Monica: Not yet... but I think I may have an idea
[ Later on, Phoebe walks to Monica and Chandler's apartment. Monica left a note saying "Come to Central Perk" ]
-- Ending Credits --
[ Central Perk looked dark from the outside, but it was un-locked so Phoebe went in. The lights came on and all of her friends, classmates, and co-workers jump up shouting "Surprise". Over the counter was a banner that read "Class of 2005 ]
Phoebe: What's going on?
Monica (handing Phoebe her cap and gown): It's your graduation, silly
[ One by one, the teacher had the students walk to the counter and he presented them with their diplomas ]
Chandler (whispering to Monica): Should we say anything?
Monica (rubbing her belly and smiling): Not now. This is her night